March is a month in which education is done to promote greater understanding about self-injury. People often keep it a secret, but the urge to self-harm isn’t uncommon, especially in adolescents and young adults. This is a topic that can be uncomfortable to discuss, but there is healing available with treatment. Feeling safe to talk about this issue with a trusted friend or family member is the first step towards understanding the behavior and finding relief.
The National Alliance on Mental Illness has some helpful information in learning how to address this issue.
What is Self-Harm
Self-harm or self-injury means hurting yourself on purpose. One common method is cutting with a sharp object. Some people feel an impulse to cause burns, pull out hair or pick at wounds to prevent healing.
Hurting yourself- or thinking about hurting yourself- is a sign of emotional distress. These uncomfortable emotions may grow more intense if a person continues to use self-harm as a coping mechanism. It also causes feelings of shame. The scars caused by frequent cutting or burning can be permanent.
Why People Self-Harm
Those at the most risk are people who have experienced trauma, neglect or abuse. The urge to hurt yourself may start with overwhelming anger, frustration or pain. When a person is not sure how to deal with emotions, or learned as a child to hide emotions, self-harm may feel like a release. Sometimes, injuring yourself stimulates the body’s endorphins or pain-killing hormones, thus raising their mood. Or if a person doesn’t feel many emotions, they might cause themselves pain in order to feel something “real” to replace emotional numbness. Once a person injures themselves, they may experience shame and guilt. The behavior can become a dangerous cycle and a long-time habit. Self-harm isn’t the same as attempting suicide. However, it is a symptom of emotional pain that should be taken seriously. If someone is hurting themselves, they may be at an increased risk of feeling suicidal. It’s important for the individual to get the therapeutic support in healing the underlying root emotions.
How to Help Someone using Self-Harm
Perhaps you have noticed a friend or family member with frequent bruises or bandages. If someone is wearing long sleeves and pants even in hot weather, they may be trying to hide injuries or scarring. Keep in mind that this is a behavior that is part of a larger condition and there may be additional signs of emotional distress. They might make statements that sound hopeless or worthless, have poor impulse control, or have difficulty getting along with others. If you are concerned that a family member or friend might be hurting themselves, ask them how they’re doing and be prepared to listen to the answer, even if it makes you uncomfortable.
Steps in Pursuit
- Gently encourage someone to get treatment by stating that self-harm isn’t uncommon, and therapists can help.
- If someone you love is in active mental health crisis and threatening to harm themselves, reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Line by calling OR texting 24/7, 365 days a year, at 988.
- Be intentional to show kindness to those around you in the community by making eye contact, smiling and speaking words of encouragement.
Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, (1 Thessalonians 5:11).
This may be a hard subject to understand. One of the best things to tell those you care about is that while you may not fully understand, you’ll be there to help.
Continue the Pursuit,
Denise
